Fake Meat.

Since I've stopped eating meat (I still eat seafood so some would not technically deem me to be a vegetarian) a little over a year ago I've been trying out some 'fake meats.' This has sometimes been for fun and sometimes to actually find something interesting to eat. I must admit when I first started this whole not eating meat thing I found fake meats funny and a bit strange. But, now - for me - anyways it's not so much about finding something that really tastes like the actual meat but, something that is different and spices up what can otherwise become a fairly boring veggie routine (i.e. shitloads of stirfrys etc.) That being said, I have enjoyed some fake meats that taste somewhat like I remember meat tasting but, for me, that is usually a happy coincidence. Anywho I thought I'd review some of the fake meats I've bought or made or want to try - more for a personal record than anything.

Yves Breakfast Patties. I only ate these within a breakfast sandwich of cheese eggs on english muffin. In this context, this fake meat was awesome. I'd rate it 8 fake dead animals out of 10.

Yves Veggie Ground Round Mexican. This is something I've gotten 3 or 4 times now. I've really enjoyed it. I think the texture is pretty representative of actual groundbeef and the spices make it taste taco-y. I've yet to try the regular ground though and I suspect it'd be way less replicative of the taste. I'd rate it 9/10.

Tofurky sausages (I get the sundried tomato). I've got these a few times. I usually cut them into pieces and fry them up and place them within a stirfry or pasta. I've never eaten them in a bun. Within the context that I've eaten them, though, they have been awesome. I really like the texture and the sun dried tomato tastes delicious. Though I suspect they'd not stand up quite as well in a bun unless it's bbq-ed maybe. I'd give it 8.5/10.

Lick's Nature Burger.
These were suggested by my vegan pal, Elliot, as the best fake burgers around. I've had them once - pan-fried - I'd give them 8/10.

Yves the good veggie burger.
Decent. I've had them pan-fried twice. 7.5/10.

Yves Veggie Turkey Slices.
These creeped me out. They emulated the weird processed meat taste of sandwich meat a little too well. I only had them once and didn't get them again because I was creeped out. That being said, after eating twice at Sadie's Diner when I was in Toronto at the beginning of the month, I might buy some of this again to make a fake club sandwich. Clubs used to be my panic order. You know, when you're in a restaurant with a group of people and they all decided what they want and you need to order or risk sending the wait staff back until YOU, just you, decide what you want to eat.
I'd give it 5/10 for my own personal tastes but this is biased by the fact that I don't really like sandwich meat. I've also heard Tofurky fake turkey slices are better.

Veggie Bacon Strips. Okay nothing can emulate bacon, nothing. That said, I tried this in a fake club and it was okay. So, if I'm going to make one of those I'd buy it again. 4/10.

Fake duck. Okay, so I've never had real duck. Oh that's a lie I ate Turducken once at my sister's. But, who can tell what meat tasted like what. Anywho, in Toronto with my vegan pal again he took me to one of his favourite random vegan/veggie haunts at 666 Dundas Street West (yup, really) - Buddha's Vegetarian Foods - where we ate fake duck. We then split a veggie dish which I had like 3 bites of because the portions are enormous. This place was also ridiculously cheap like stupid cheap. I'm totally going next time I'm in the city. In any case, the fake duck was awesome. I'm going to go to a place in Chinatown, actually it's in my old hood - New 168 Market - to try out their frozen duck which some internet research revealed. I'll report back. Word on the street, er internet, is that they also have frozen edamame (which I gained a liking for in Toronto but can't find at my local grocery stores). I've also found a place that is Vegetarian Thai just south of my current hood - Sacred Garden - which I've yet to try which also apparently features fake duck amongst other fake meats.

"Chicken Fingers". In preparation for my Toronto friends visit in February I picked up this recipe. Now they don't taste like chicken fingers but, they are awesome. Namely, the shake 'n bake is awesome.


Anyone have any other good/fun fake meats to try? Or restaurants in Ottawa to recommend? I've been to The Table (didn't really like it), The Green Door (a staple for my graduate degree as it was across the road), Perfection Satisfaction Promise (awesome. one of my first dining out experiences in Ottawa suggested by Amnesty staff who called it the cult restaurant which I didn't get until I was there.), So Good (not all veggie but lots of veggie/vegan options. I've never been here without someone saying, without thinking, this is "so good" followed by a series of groans), Bread and Sons Bakery (was good place to grab lunches when I worked at CASA), The Wild Oat (AMAZING crepes and other goodies), Herb and Spice (great place to pick up some groceries)....

I've still yet to try out a home made tofurky, ahem Toby....

I also need to pick this up even though I never went to Fresh when I was in Toronto, ahem Elliot/Gabby.